Even so, we were all able to be blissfully unified, as we occupied Hot Girl Summer together. Or were we? Before answering that, let s try and make sense of the trend and journey that is Hot Girl Summer. Advertisement So, what is even a Hot Girl Summer?
Plenty of explainers have described it as a state of mind revolving around unapologetic pleasure-seeking.
And still, our online parlance set a hopeful agenda. Maybe not. Maybe, our hopes for the future are directly proportional to our current sense of despair or exhaustion. I knew boys masturbated, but I had no idea that girls did too.
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I thought I was a genius discovering this magical spot on my body that gave me so much joy. But I knew, through overt and covert cues from family, religion, and school, that masturbation was something to keep to myself. This is especially true for the fear-based, heteronormative lessons taught to girls and young women, who are consistently told there is something inherently wrong, dirty, and shameful about our bodies.
Too often consent is taught as a checkbox — an obstacle a partner needs to get past to gain access to sex. However, like sex education in general, it is often focused on avoiding risks, including sexual assault. We need real and practical talk about consent, pleasure, and sex, for safer and more ethical connections.
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When we move past our tendencies to focus on the mechanics of sexual acts, we set ourselves up to have satisfying sexual and intimate relationships. That starts with good sex ed , which, for me, means understanding that there is no one-size-fits-all model for sex and intimacy.
Currently, we are taught heterosexist ideas of how cisgender men and cisgender women are supposed to act — myths that certain bodies are worthy of pleasure, while others are not; that men should always be up for sex, always be the sexual aggressor, and have multiple sexual partners.
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All while we teach women they should be passive, their pleasure should be predicated on what their partner enjoys, and they should refrain from expressions of sexual desire to ensure that they are never seen as a slut. Don t lose out on the chance to get to know each other a little better and feel where all this can lead to.
You could perhaps find a simple relationship with someone or perhaps even something more. You never know where all things can cause. Subscribe to Sex-Dating.
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