So, yes, I thought about getting married and having children.
At first, I wanted someone to take care of me — it was what everyone was doing in those days! You could go out, you could meet men. You could sleep with men! There was a point in my life where I was dating a lot of different men, and that was great. But as I grew up, I decided that I wanted just one person.
It had to be someone whom I cared about a lot. Growing up, I felt like a lot of my friends were having sex with men just because they wanted somebody to be with. Somebody to stay with them. And that was never important to me. Everything changed for me! I wanted a partner in life. I used to see women with men, and the men were so obnoxious.
Any man who is clingy and all over me, I have a real problem with. He is very interesting; we have a great relationship.
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He does his own thing, and I do mine. We had major issues because our families are different ethnicities and practice different religions. But ultimately, we decided to elope. So she came, too.
For me, the only way that I can feel pleasure in a sexual relationship is to be with someone whom I really care about. Who else can give you pleasure? Can you experience different pleasure with different sexual partners?
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But it still has to be somebody that I care about. The attitude around sex has changed so much since I was younger. It makes a difference. Sex is very emotional. What if you have sex with someone and afterwards they never talk to you again?
It happens a lot! You have to be ready to understand that. I was raised in a home that celebrated pleasure. The pleasure of daily life was emphasized. It was important to celebrate each meal. Nothing was done with haste, just to get through the day. Meals were always a special time full with pleasure — the pleasure of the food, the pleasure of the taste. In fact, meals were seductive.
It was full of pleasure! The pleasure of the sun and the salt. It was not lost on my parents. They knew the seasons.
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